How to Build a Good Relationship with your Husband

wedding couples

Marriage is the most intimate union between two partners. When love is new, it always seems that the romantic feelings between you two will last forever. However, in time, the pressures and challenges of life cause us to give our romance less and less consideration, such that it falls away. When this happens, the relationship between couples becomes scarred, sometimes even resulting to divorce. If you are a wife, are you looking for ways on How to Build a Good Relationship with your Husband? You can always make things better by constantly nurturing your relationship and giving it some more attention and care. However, this is not as easy as it sounds. Unlike when you were newly-weds, you don’t have the time to go for long vacations with your husband or spend many hours in bed.

If your marriage is to be successful, you need to put in more effort. As a wife, you have to learn how to balance your marital life with other demands and pressures of life, such as caring for kids, household chores and the family. Also, remember that a good relationship is not born by itself. You can Build a Good Relationship with your Husband by accepting his mistakes, fulfilling your commitments and learning how to show gratitude. When you do this, you will build an unbreakable bond with your husband.

But, more is required to develop a better relationship with your spouse. In this article, I will share with you 9 suggestions on How to Build a Good Relationship with your Husband. Keep reading!

1. Use Every Opportunity to Show Love

Why did you and your partner decide to get married? The answer is obvious: you loved each other. Yes, nothing is more important in a relationship than love. So, whether you are already married to each other, or are in a relationship, you must use every opportunity to show love to your partner. Showering your partner with love will help to make your bond much stronger and also decrease the chances of your separating or divorcing.

But, just how can you show love to your partner? Start with simple things like waking up with your partner. Give your husband a hug or a kiss when you wake up. Prepare breakfast for him, serve the food yourself and eat together. Don’t just tell him goodbye when he is going to work; give him a forehead kiss. Send him a lunch box at work. And, when he comes back from work, hug him again and go to bed together. Such simple gestures are perfect ways of showing love to your mate.

2. Limit your Expectations

Having several expectations of a relationship is not wrong. However, expecting that our partner will meet all of our expectations is the biggest mistake we can make. Clinton Power, a clinical relationship counsellor, once said that unrealistic expectations “set up couples to fail.” When our expectations are not realized, it creates in us feelings of despair, anxiety and sadness.

Therefore, limit your expectations of marriage. For example, don’t expect that you and your partner will spend as much time together as you did during your courting days or honeymoon. Accept that time goes on and responsibilities set in, leaving both you and your partner with less time for each other. Of course, you both must spend some quality time together. However, you have to be realistic and understand that your husband won’t be able to give you honeymoon-like time.

When you limit your expectations, your relationship with your husband will grow. Also, the love you feel for each other will deepen, such that you enjoy a more fulfilling marriage life.

3. Make Your Husband Fall in Love with You every day

When the courting days end and couples get married, love doesn’t end there. You need to fill your marriage life with love too. How can you do that? As a wife, you most probably feel assured that your husband loves you. So, you don’t have to put on makeup or dress nicely. After all, your husband loves you for who you are. But, is that right?

It is good to feel assured that your husband loves you for who you are. Still, this doesn’t mean that you stop pampering and taking care of yourself. Only after loving yourself can your husband love you unconditionally.

Therefore, take time to pamper yourself. You don’t have to put on expensive dresses or heavy make-up to look gorgeous. Just take care of yourself a little. When your husband takes you out, dress well and be confident. When you take care of yourself in such a manner, your husband will fall in love with you every day.

4. Don’t Try to Give Advice All the Time

The biggest tension point for most relationships is the receiving and/or giving of advice. Dr Anna Ranieri (, an expert in marriage life, commented that while women usually take advice from men as condescending, men consider advice from women as a scolding.

Yes, you heard it right. If you wish to build a good relationship with your husband, it is the high time you stopped trying to give him advice all the time. When your partner says or does something wrong, learn to keep your mouth shut. Even if you feel that your way of doing things is much better, give your husband some space and let him learn after several tries.

It is true that, sometimes, you will have to give some advice to your spouse. However, avoid doing this every single time your partner makes a mistake. Doing so will only work to frustrate your husband and make him feel worthless. You are your husband’s partner, not his mother. So, support him through every phase of life and allow him to make mistakes while at it.

5. Make Some Special Time for your Husband

As a married woman, you know that being a wife is not easy. You have children to take care of, household chores to do, and even your self to take care of. However, don’t let your busy schedules make you forget why you are there, that is, for your husband. Were it not for your husband’s love, you wouldn’t have had those adorable children, or that loving family. As the head of the family, your husband is the one who works all day to provide everything that you need.

Therefore, make time for your husband. Develop the right balance of marriage, giving it enough time and attention. No matter how busy you are with the family, take some time to take care of your husband’s happiness.

For example, plan for dates and outings. Or, try out new things together. And, when you do make time for him, leave all your worries behind and give him your full undivided attention. Spending such quality time together will help you build a good relationship with your husband.

6. Express Gratitude When He Does Something Well

Sometimes, when your husband is free at home, he can help you do some small household chores. Whether your husband helps you out of his initiative, or after you’ve asked him to, take that chance to express gratitude. A simple ‘thank you’ can do a lot to make your man feel appreciated and drawn to you.

So, don’t be like the larger percentage of wives who take their husbands’ assistance for granted. When your partner cooks food, say ‘thank you’ even if it came out burnt. When he brings you flowers or groceries, appreciate him. Will your appreciative attitude bring any reward?

Glenn Fox, a neuroscientist, conducted a study on how gratitude and appreciation manifest in the brain. Glenn found links between brain structures and gratitude, that tied to stress relief and social bonding. Therefore, you can trust that expressing genuine gratitude to your husband will draw him closer to you.

man and woman cooking

7. Learn to Resolve Conflicts

There is no perfect relationship. Even when you do your best to please your husband, you will still experience some tumbles and storms in your marriage. The secret to a lasting relationship, however, is learning how to resolve conflicts maturely.

When your spouse is angry, allow him to be. Don’t start complaining or arguing as doing so will only make your conflict worse. Rather, be patient with your husband and listen carefully as he explains his hurt feelings. Even when the complaints are about you, don’t be quick to defend yourself or start a blame game.

Your main aim of resolving conflicts should be to make peace with your spouse but not to win over him. If you only argue to win over your mate, the loss is yours; the relationship with your husband will be scarred.

8. Support your Husband

They say, “Behind every successful man is a woman.” That statement usually holds most of the time. Think about this; what is your prime purpose in marriage? Of course, it is to be your husband’s helper. Therefore, when your spouse is discouraged or frustrated, encourage him. Reassure him that you will always be there for him, come what may. Even when your husband seems to have hit the dead end in life, don’t abandon him; beat the phases of life together.

When a wife supports her husband, nothing can stop him from being successful. More so, when you support your spouse, he will also try to do the same for you. When both of you support each other, you will share your dreams, joys and problems. This will result in a closer relationship between you and your husband.

9. Accept your Partner as he is

Does your husband surprise you less than your friend’s husband? If yes, then this should not come out as a surprise. People are different; what one man is good at, another will not be good at. Therefore, you need to stop comparing your husband with other men. After all, who did you fall in love with your husband or your friend’s husband? If you want to develop a good relationship with your husband, you will learn to accept and appreciate your partner for who he is.

What can help you do that? First, find the uniqueness in him. What particular qualities and attributes make him stand out from other men? Identify these and appreciate him for his good qualities. Also, be observant and notice the small things that your husband does for you. Not only should you avoid comparing your husband with other men, but you should also never try to change him. Accept him for who he is, even his negative side.


Has it been a long time since your husband brought you flowers or told you that he loves you? Well, if you dig deeper, you may realize that the problem is you, and not him. To Build a Good Relationship with your Husband, follow these 9 suggested tips.

Make time for your husband and take every opportunity you get to show him, love. When he is frustrated, learn how to solve conflicts in a good way. Don’t always give him advice, rather, support him, limit your expectations and accept him for who he is. When you follow these 9 best tricks, your husband will fall hopelessly in love with you every single day.

I tried to put together some effective ways of How to Build a Good Relationship with your Husband. I hope these tricks will work out for you. Have you already applied one or more of the above suggestions? Which one worked out best for you? How did your husband react? Tell me in your comments below.

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3 thoughts on “How to Build a Good Relationship with your Husband”

  1. Delphine Tanyah Tangem

    Wow, thanks for the encouraging words. This serves as a reminder of the things we learnt but kind of forgotten or taking relationships for granted. This is a wake up call. Thanks a lot

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