Christian Dating, what is it?
Are you a Christian woman looking to pursue a serious romantic relationship? This article on Christian Dating Tips for Women will help you remain devout to your faith while still getting the best out of your relationship.
It is no secret that navigating the waters of dating can be quite challenging for devout Christian women. Most women who have put God first in their lives look for partners who share the same love and zeal for God. Yet, there are not as many devout partners to choose from.
On the other hand, for those who have already found their ideal spouses, the relationship may not be as happy and fulfilling. It could be that you don’t know how to include God in the relationship or remaining loyal to Bible principles proves quite hard.
Regardless of which situation you are in, you can benefit from applying Christian dating tips in your relationship. Consider eleven tips that can help you navigate dating successfully as a Christian woman:
1. Start with a Prayer
Marriage is a gift from God. He instituted the very first marriage on Earth; the marriage between Adam and Eve. Therefore, before you can jump into the dating pool, start with a prayer, and ask for God’s guidance.
Tell Good your hopes in the relationship. What are your expectations? What do you fear most about a relationship? Pour all your feelings to God and ask for his absolute Guidance. By praying to God, you will be putting your complete trust in the only Supreme Being who can help you succeed in your dating life.
2. Be Yourself and Speak Up Your Mind
Compared with non-Christian men, Christian men are relatively fewer in number. However, this should not make you become desperate and settle for whichever man that comes your way. The desire for dating and companionship should not make you lower your standards or compromise them just to keep a partner.
On the contrary, you should always be yourself when dating. Don’t be afraid to speak up about what you are looking for in a partner. Also, if you notice any annoying behaviors on your partner’s side, speak up and let them know how you feel about their behavior.
Matthew 18:15 says, “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.” Yes, if he is the right partner for you, he will listen to you when you speak up your mind.
3. Maintain Eye Contact to Show Respect and Compassion
“Let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” | Ephesians 5:33.
All men have a natural desire for respect. It is no wonder that the Bible encourages Christian women to respect their husbands. In fact, respect is the only major requirement outlined for women in the Bible.
Even if you are still dating and are not married yet, you still need to show your partner respect. And one way you can show respect to your partner is by maintaining eye contact with him, especially when holding serious conversations.
Maintaining eye contact shows more than just respect for your spouse; it also shows compassion and interest. And it goes without saying that men tend to gravitate towards women who show deep respect and compassion.
4. Set Boundaries for Yourself and Stick to Them
Just like other aspects of life, relationships need boundaries if they are to thrive. After all, despite being Christians who love God, you and your partner are normal humans with normal feelings and emotions. Therefore, without clearly set boundaries, your relationship could easily become too close and physical, eventually resulting to the two of you committing a sin.
To prevent all these, have an open conversation with your partner and set clear boundaries. Talk about how far you are willing to go when it comes to physical touch and intimacy. Discuss what is acceptable and what is not in the relationship.
For example, do you trust yourself being alone together in secluded places? How does each of you feel about kissing? With such well-defined boundaries, you will be able to avoid any possible frustrations and sinning against God.
5. Let God Go First
Ask women who have been in failed relationships, and most of these will tell you that they thought they had found their ideal lifelong partner, only to be disappointed later. This fact proves that, while you might think you know what you want in a relationship, your opinions might actually be wrong.
After all, as Jeremiah 17:9 puts it, “The heart is more treacherous than anything else and is desperate.” Therefore, instead of trusting your own heart and feelings, it is wise that you let God go first in your relationship. But how exactly can you do that?
The best way to let God go first is to look up for his guidance in the Bible. Read through all the rules and principles that he has provided for couples, husbands, and wives. Then, be humble enough to follow these directions and apply them in your life.
6. Consult with Other Christian Friends
“Without consultation, plans are frustrated; but with many counselors they succeed.” | Proverbs 15:22
As a woman in love, you undoubtedly want to make your own decisions and do that which makes you happy with your partner. However, for a healthier and more successful relationship, it is advisable that you consult and seek advice from other Christian friends.
While you can still seek advice from your single Christian friends, the best people to consult with are couples who are already in happy relationships. Such couples have experiences about their dating life, and they can provide you with practical Christian dating tips on how to go about your dating life as a Christian.
So don’t hold back from making friendships with happy Christian couples. Ask them about the challenges they faced. How did they deal with these? What helped them remain chaste throughout their courtship? You will always have a lot to learn and benefit from by consulting with these ones.
7. Take Care of Your Inner and Outer Beauty
Outer beauty refers to the outward or physical appearance of a person. Simply put, it is what first meets the eye when a person looks at you. However, outer beauty does not necessarily mean that you need to be beautiful and extremely attractive just to have a happy relationship.
Rather, simple things such as maintaining hygiene, cleanliness, wearing clean clothes and smelling nice can do a lot to help you become a desirable person to your partner. Then to add on that, you need to develop inner beauty, the true and ultimate mark of beauty.
Inner beauty mainly refers to your personality and inner attitude; what you are on the inside. 1 Peter 3:3-4, defines inner beauty as “the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.”
Even with a gorgeous face, perfect face, and captivating beauty, this will all be meaningless if you don’t focus on developing a good personality.
8. Be Honest and Straightforward
Being together in a relationship does not always mean that you are both headed in a relationship. Your partner could be simply leading you on without any intentions of committing. So, unless you wish to risk possible heartbreak in the future, it is advisable that you be honest and straightforward with your partner.
Ask your partner where he sees the relationship in a few years to come. And while at times you might be afraid of the response that you might get, knowing the answer early is best to avoid any frustrations and pains. For example, if you notice that your partner cannot give you a straight answer, this might be a red flag about where your relationship is headed.
9. Respect Yourself and Honor God
For a relationship to thrive and grow stronger, both partners should manifest deep love and respect for each other. But how ironical it would be to ask that your partner respect you, only to turn around and lack any respect for yourself.
Therefore, it is crucial that you learn how to respect yourself as a Christian woman. Hold yourself to the same standards that other people hold you. You can cultivate self-respect by standing by your values, morals and maintaining your boundaries even when it is hard to.
However, note that respecting yourself does not mean that you start boasting or develop pride. You can still cultivate self-respect while maintaining a humble demeanour. And in addition to respecting yourself, honour God and let his love shine in you. This will make you ten times more attractive to others, your partner included.
10. Focus on Your Partner’s Growth in Faith
2 Corinthians 6:14 says, “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?” This means that the person you should date must share strong faith and love for God just like you.
But, in this modern era where people meet online via platforms such as EliteSingles, how can you tell a person’s level of commitment to faith? In most cases, you might be tempted to look for signs of godliness in a person, such as if he goes to church or owns a Bible.
However, such signs of godliness can actually be misleading. Simply owning a Bible or being a regular churchgoer does not mean someone is committed in faith. The best way to tell your partner’s spirituality would be to ask those who know him. Also, as you interact, look for signs that show growth in their faith.
11. Trust God to Help You Find That Ideal Relationship
Even after doing all you can in your power, you are not guaranteed of finding that perfect relationship you always dream of. As mentioned above in Tip 1 (Start with a Prayer), marriage is a gift from God. Therefore, only He can bless your efforts and help you find that ideal relationship.
Therefore, trust in God. Believe in Him and be 100% sure that He can fulfill all your hopes and expectations for a relationship. Remember that God wants the very best for you. So, when you share with Him your real feelings, fears, anxieties, and insecurities, He will no doubt help you and bless your life with a beautiful, strong romantic relationship.
Choosing your lifelong partner is the most important decision you will ever make in life. The person you choose to marry will greatly determine how you will spend the rest of your life; whether a happy life or one full of regrets and misery.
However, marriage does not just happen; it starts with dating and courtship. Therefore, if you wish to live a happy life, you need to take the dating period more seriously. Start with a prayer and let God go first in your relationship.
Also, set well-defined boundaries with your partner and adhere to them. Have deep respect for him, while also not forgetting to respect and hold yourself to the same standards. Be honest with your partner and always maintain eye contact with him whenever having conversations.
Ultimately, remember to trust in God. He is the originator of life and marriage, so only He can help you find your ideal partner and enjoy a happy long-lasting relationship. Trust in Him fully and He sure will help you!
Which of the above Christian Dating Tips for Women have you found most effective? Which ones have worked out for you? Please let me know.
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